Funny dating advice for guys

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)If it is true that girls marry men like theirfathers, then it is understandable why so many mothers cry so much at weddings. Never let your man’s mind wander — it’s too little to be out alone.

Don’t imagine you can change a man — unless he’s in diapers. Remember: When SHE cancels a date, it is because...“She has to.”When HE cancels a date, it is because..

Whether it's a crap day at work or not getting into your top choice grad school (or, er, any grad schools) (Hand raised! When he's slaying with a story about that time he stole stop signs with a troubled C-list celebrity, you can just paste a smile on your face and check out. You don't have to worry about not knowing anyone at your friend's baby's bris because you'll be BFF with everyone in about five minutes. You know your best friend's snoozefest of a husband who drones on about his two obsessions — tequila and the WWE! — and it makes you want to blow your brains out from boredom?

Funny guys are great for turning that frown upside down. Parties don't start until you get there (fashionably late, of course) and the second you leave, everyone else just disintegrates into a pile of dust. Alternatively/awesomely, the pressure is off you to be "on" all the time.

Maximum gain for minimum output — all from the comfort of a couch.

Funny guys aren't afraid to take any situation by the horn and completely own it.

This happens for two reasons: 1)She’s on her best behavior. EVERY SINGLE WOMAN we’ve ever asked says that confidence is a deal-breaker when it comes to choosing a guy. It typically helps to practice just talking to women you don’t already know.

Dress nice, bathe, smell good, ask lots of questions, smile, laugh, exhibit a little knowledge about something interesting, and most importantly listen to her. Actor George Hamilton once wrote that when he goes to a new town he finds the nicest restaurant and pays a visit in the afternoon. He gives them his credit card and says, “Please take an imprint of this.

Women don’t make fools of men; most of them are the DIY type. Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest he is too old to do it. Never trust a husband too far or a bachelor too near.

If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

After serving as a medic in the army, Jerry went on to graduate from The Ohio State University with a bachelors degree in English.

A former golden gloves champion, Jerry now spends his time on the golf course, losing.

So even if your uncle gets drunk and tries to hit on your neighbor's exchange student, he can tap dance the family back into good times and simultaneously kick your uncle out in a sly way that leaves everyone forgetting he even existed.

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