Men and dating after divorce

Jennifer's, Samantha's and John's concerns are common, because according to the U. Census Bureau, 19.3 million Americans get divorced each year, and many of them date and eventually remarry.

Perhaps you share their concerns, as you're also wondering how you can reenter the dating world after divorce — and do so according to God's standards. Divorce is the death of the dreams you had when you committed yourself "for better or for worse." As a Christian, you can't simply separate from your spouse one day and hit the dating field the next.

I have witnessed this many times and men have openly shared with me that they would love to be married again one day and “make it right this time.” I have dated divorced men who have acknowledged that they spent a great deal of time building their businesses during their marriages and they wish they had been more romantic or listened more or had brought their wives flowers more often or had been more complimentary to their spouses. There are many divorced men out there who have taken the time to work on themselves and their mistakes after their marriage ended and have a new-found commitment to making things right the next time around.

Ladies, as much as we love men (and, I really do), we want to acknowledge that they can often mature, grow up and find their way in a relationship a bit more slowly than women do.

As expected, women initiating divorce ultimately identify their spouse as the “true” initiator.

The irony is that men, despite their own dissatisfaction are more likely to resist divorce.

Despite the security and sense of identity traditional marriages provide, they enable men to neglect the particular areas of personal growth that separation and divorce forced them to face.

Whether repairing the kitchen table or planning a romantic evening, the male ego and inner child have a strong need and desire to get it right and succeed.

Men often feel this need after a failed marriage and while entering into a new relationship.

If you start dating prematurely, you could be hurting — rather than honoring — those you date.

When Becky was invited to lunch by a man she met at a bookstore, she was excited.

by Larry O'Connor, MFT Men’s Challenges with Separation and Divorce “Women grieve the loss of a relationship before ending it, men grieve it after it has ended,” may say it best.

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